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Dec. 3rd, 2009


[info]revme

(no subject)

CONTENT DAY AHOY: Josh of Arc on Lou Dobbs (in print, not in real life): http://ping.fm/hqIw8

[info]drinky_lemur

the dark sword of chaos

One last thing about that copy of Worlds of Power #3: Ninja Gaiden: this was stamped on the inside back cover.



Don't front like that isn't adorable.

[info]revme

(no subject)

Told you it was NEW CONTENT DAY! Emily C. just interviewed Nick Abadzis, creator of "Laika"! http://ping.fm/rC2fF

[info]revme

(no subject)

It is CONTENT DAY! New: Joe Meyer's Furreh Nuuz Teevee #1! http://ping.fm/sIn53

Dec. 2nd, 2009


[info]revme

(no subject)

Just posted! A new feature: Things That Are Neat! This time: GOATS! (the animals, not the comic.) http://ping.fm/1T9ke

[info]drinky_lemur

the CIA was merely a step along the way to Ryu's ultimate destiny

The Internet connection's been going up and down for an hour and I haven't really been able to get any work done, so I've been passing the time reading a copy of Worlds of Power #3: Ninja Gaiden I found in the pile of donated children's materials. It's awful (just like the game it's based on oh I fucking went there, eat every bite of it)!



There are actually lines like "I am called Basaquer, the third of the Jaquio's bosses". You can tell when someone is really bad news when their dialogue is in bold type, and sometimes even a different font, like "Electrify! HAAWW-HAW-HAW-HAW-HAW!"

(NB: That guy turned out to be a cyborg. Get it?!)



I noticed that the book is stated to be "a Seth Godin Production" in several places, which is extremely amusing to me as Seth Godin is the credited producer of those dreadful direct-to-VHS Nintendo "hint" videos hosted by Skip Rogers.

[info]twolumps_feed

Two Lumps - Dec 2, 2009

Two Lumps comic for Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Dec. 1st, 2009


[info]drinky_lemur

a post-cancuncalyptic role-playing game



Ohhhhhhhh shit.



So I guess we're going to watch this thing. For REAL.

THE REAL REALITY OF REALITY FILM SCREENING AND DISCUSSION ONLINE.......... WEB 2.0 BRINGING THE REALITY OF THE REAL CANCUN TO THE PEOPLE.........



"It don't get no realer than this though dog"—Snoop Dogg, Wikiquote.com



Is that superstar Internet font COMIC SANS in the closing credits? Bunim/Murray Productions keeping it REAL for the WIRED GENERATION..........

[info]bridgeportcat

(no subject)

So I'm finally on the TRAIN to using google reader. If you have one I would love to follow you and look at your shared items (if you do that, because god knows I do). Here is my google reader shared page. I think all I need to have is your email address to follow you so I'll screen the comments and etc.

Also I totally roasted a turkey and it was SO GOOD

[info]drinky_lemur

cancuncalypse: the fallout



As best I can tell, the timeline goes like this:

1.) I post a passionate appreciation of the 2003 "reality" film The Real Cancun to a Facebook group called "The Real Cancun".

2.) D. Smith comes along and takes my post completely at face value; he is delighted and inspired by my enthusiasm and posts not only a rah-rah right on in response but recommends a second, "hard to find" movie called The Quest. Evidently the titular "quest" involves someone losing their virginity. Creative!

3.) D. Cowan, a friend of mine, is visibly tickled by D. Smith's tragic mistake.

4.) Smith suspects that his sincere love for the 2003 "reality" film The Real Cancun is being mocked, and visits Cowan's Facebook profile for retaliatory ammunition.

5.) Smith discovers that Cowan and I are friends and, somehow, manages to draw the correct conclusion.

6.) Smith goes completely fucking mental and suggests that Cowan and I take a trip to Cancun for the express purpose of drinking sodas and masturbating (presumably these are separate activities).

I had no idea that the 2003 "reality" film The Real Cancun inspired this sort of REAL PASSIONATE FURY in people. Clearly, the real rabbit hole of real Cancun reality goes much deeper into the real feelings of real people than I'd originally suspected. Perhaps a second Cancuncalypse is warranted.

Nov. 30th, 2009


[info]revme

(no subject)

New! A (real!) review of Sirens of Titan by Kurt Vonnegut! http://ping.fm/DuyAi

[info]drinky_lemur

little things I like, no. 1

The way the numbers indicating the points for snagging a fruit in Ms. Pac-Man are along a diagonal, and the clean little typeface they cooked up for displaying them, which to my knowledge wasn't used anywhere in a Namco game before or since. Lovely!

By way of comparison (Pac-Man is on the left, Ms. Pac-Man on the right):



While I'm on the subject of Pac-Man, the high score board for Pac-Land has one of the best titles of all time:



This is true.

[info]twolumps_feed

Two Lumps - Nov 30, 2009

Two Lumps comic for Monday, November 30, 2009

Nov. 27th, 2009

[info]twolumps_feed

Two Lumps - Nov 27, 2009

Two Lumps comic for Friday, November 27, 2009

Nov. 25th, 2009


[info]revme

(no subject)

Enjoy this repost of Kittysneezes' review of "Trauma Center: Under The Knife 2" for the DS! http://ping.fm/31aoM

[info]twolumps_feed

Two Lumps - Nov 25, 2009

Two Lumps comic for Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Nov. 23rd, 2009


[info]drinky_lemur

scat circus

The hilarious thing—well, one of them—about my dad is how squeamish he is. I mean, I've got my own little weaknesses and I wouldn't just take cheap shots at someone feeling unwell about X, Y, or Z, but you have to understand that (a) my dad is a man who takes great, arguably disproportionate pride in his military service [despite never having seen active duty, being one of that unfortunately large slice of the aging male population that was too young for Vietnam and too old for Grenada and has spent their post-soldier years rocking the solid chickenhawk vote] and (b) spends his leisure time watching cable television shows like Hitler's Greatest Bullet Holes and Secret Sinus Infections of the Third Reich. So for him to wrinkle his nose—literally, he goes into full-blown human disgust mode—at not just the words but concepts of farts and poops and boogers just tickles me to no end.

I'll give you an example. A couple of years ago, my aunt—his sister, the one you might remember that does the crazy over-the-top Halloween parties—gave my mom an egg separator as a Christmas present. Now, what makes this egg separator special is that it's a little kiln-fired cartoonish clay head: you crack the egg and empty it into this hollow head and the whites drain out the nostril(s), leaving the yolk safe and intact in the brainpan. So anyway, here's this thing, this Christmas present and kitchen gadget, and my dad sees the whites dribblin' out the nostril—again, this is a man who watches war footage on cable every night and who raised two children that were more or less chronically and graphically ill—and he goes awwwwww and turns his head and raises his hand in that very involuntary disgust reaction. Hilarious!

My mom's got a saltier tongue than he does and it drives him bananas. I was on the phone with him tonight—aha, the narrative thrust at last—and I heard a voice shouting in the background, and then that familiar awwwwww.

"Dad?"
"Your mom—your mom wants to know how your pooper is doing."

(I had been suffering from chronic constipation for a couple of weeks and my parents wouldn't have even known about it had I not gone to the doctor, whose receptionist later that very day had happened to see my mom and had told her [a] that I'd just been in and [b] that I was looking very healthy and handsome {groan, roll eyes}, so of course my mom had had to call me that very evening with a list of demands w/r/t my fiber input, lifestyle, etc etc.)

"What? Oh, my butt! Everything's normal. My... 'pooper's' fine."
"He says his pooper's fine."
"Tell her I'll crap in a baggie for the next couple days, stick it in the freezer, and bring it over for Thanksgiving."
"Awwwwww. He—he said he'll bag some and bring 'em over, frozen—"
"Yeah, she can stick 'em in the microwave real quick and then—"
"Josh—"
"—then slap 'em on the table and take a meat thermometer and take a core sample."
"Awwwwww. Okay I'm gonna let you go, you and your mom can have this—this talk about—"
"Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha."

[info]bridgeportcat

Chomp chomp

Photobucket

Made this case a few nights ago out of felt. It's for my old Rio Karma. It's not as snug as I'd like but it does the job. Also it's DARLING

[info]twolumps_feed

Two Lumps - Nov 23, 2009

Two Lumps comic for Monday, November 23, 2009

Nov. 20th, 2009


[info]drinky_lemur

terrible cultural confessions, vol. 1 no 9: the coming of the wonder man

If you're reading this, you probably remember that Street Fighter II on the SNES didn't, by default, allow for "mirror matches" in two-player fights. You couldn't have Ryu vs. Ryu, basically.

Until the code came out, of course. You had to punch it in quick—while the Capcom logo faded on and off the screen before the game booted up—and for some reason I wasn't terribly good at this, meaning that I came to associate the well-crafted, pleasant Capcom logotone with stress:



I suppose I eventually got good at it. I'd use the code even when I wasn't playing with friends, just because I liked using characters' alternate colors. I was, and am, pretty fucking girly about costumes in video games. Ask me how much time I've spent earning money for alternate Rock Band avatars just so I could dress them up just right! (Please do not actually do this.)

And you're saying to yourself, you like alternate costumes in video games; that is not a terrible confession, that is the reason people grind away for hours towards contextually meaningless in-game achievements: they want to see Raidou Kuzunoha wearing the cowboy hat and assless chaps. And oh! I know! It is not in itself terrible, and in fact it's just an ancillary detail I thought I'd mention because, well, I just wanted an excuse to talk about it. (Now, if I confessed that I was really, really into KiSS dolls for a brief period in the late 90s, I could end this entry right here, because good lord, those fucking things. Whoops!)

Something else you couldn't do in Street Fighter II was play as the bosses. This was, for a while, the Holy Fucking Grail of cheat codes. We talked about it at school, we mashed fruitlessly around on our joypads during that goddamned Capcom logotone, we sure as hell daydreamed about it, and then we ended up blowing an unreasonable amount of cash on the "Special Champion Edition" when it dropped onto the Genesis a year later.

But in the meantime, we wanted to play as the bosses so badly we could just fucking taste it—and what a letdown they finally were, eh?—and the fact that a code existed to unlock one missing piece of Street Fighter functionality existed suggested that another code was waiting in there...

And so it came to pass (and this, my precious, lovely friends, this is the confession) that I posted a message to the Prodigy online service sometime between 1992 and 1993 with the title "BOSS CODE MUST EXIST - PROOF". What followed was a post I thought to be very clever indeed, in which I did a bunch of dot-connecting between what we knew to be true about the SNES port of Street Fighter II and a bunch of posts about it I'd read. It never occurred to me, of course, that the posts I'd read—the posts that were pretty much the prime source of this PROOF—could either be (a) merely reporting interesting glitches or (b) just fucking lying. Honestly, it would be years before I hit upon the idea that some people might lie on the Internet just for fun—what would be the point of that?

With the publication of this opus, "BOSS CODE MUST EXIST - PROOF", I fully expected to shake things up. I thought I'd nailed it, and all that was left was for Capcom to come clean and release the code. "Yeah, you got us, man. Here's the code to activate a feature that we were planning on shaking you down for next year, to the tune of seventy bucks. Honey, it's me; yeah, call the swimming pool people and see if you can get our deposit back. We're totally rethinking Q4 because of some genius on the Prodigy service." Alas, I didn't get a single response, although someone else's post called "SF2 BEER DRINKERS", in which people theorized what beers and spirits their favorite characters liked, was humming along nicely. No, I wasn't jealous.

There was, in fact, no boss code for the SNES port of Street Fighter II. I was a dumb kid on the Internet before there was a World Wide Web, you guys.

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angry, rob, bitter, condensed comics

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